need to write something,

what is it, or 4 whom it will be?

I dunno

-------------------

as i backed 2 home i had to tidy my things,

i had to found many useless things (sure once they have a use, but now they don't)

and as every time i do this thing

i can't throw anything away!

why i dunno know..

i hate the idea of throwing the thing away cause they became useless

cause u don't need it any more u simply throw it away!

with no guilt feeling..

things with memories

not matter good or bad one..

i can't throw anything away

Oh God if only i can do it!

-------------------

People whom have a good memory don't have a happy life in order

somethings -unwanted things actually- always remain

which they don't want!

as i'm one of those people

sometimes i wish i don't have it

be able to 4get any thing quickly as the other people do

dates, birthdays, Numbers, voices, words..

ur head full of useless things

birthdays u don't say "Happy Birthday" on the!

dates u don't celebrate of!

numbers u don't call!

so, why u have 2 remember them all?!

-------------------

sometimes i think.

which better?

to go to the same faculty with ur 7 childhood' friends

and finish the first year with big hatred 4 them

or to go to a different faculty of thems

and finish ur 1st year with the same feeling u always had 2 them?

i think the second is better :)

-------------------

i wish i can change..

2 better or to worse

doesn't matter..

any thing else except this offside area

Finally @ HOME

it's really hurts me..

It has been so hard 4 me when it's about death cases..

finding no words 2 say, is the most thing annoying me..

(as i am a real talkative one! )

so, why at this cases i can't say a word!

Instead of making the other one holds and be stronger,

I became weak..

Instead of asking them to not cry,

I got weeping..

I can't deal with goodbye when it's only a temporary farewell..

so, i can't even imagine what if it is a permanent one!

and so, my only wish became..

just to be the 1st one who go there of all the people i do love..

cause simply,

I can't -till now- acclimate with the fact of "Farewell" ..

the idea of losing someone 4ever!

Not only u won't see them, or u won't have them at ur life..

nope!

They, won't be even exist in this world anymore..

Not wiz u, not wiz anyone else..

The idea of staying when the others are leaving,

is really hurts me!

so hard to get, so hard 2 believe, and so hard 2 live with..