Wednesday, February 14, 2007

The perfect painting..


The first time she saw it..
it took her attention..

there were another ones..
but she didn't even look at them..
she saw it only..

some attraction ahppened between them..
she felt it's completing her by some way..

some strange feelings inside her, she can't explain..
all what she can say,
It's really perfect..

Maybe if another one looked at it, won't say the same words..
But for her, it was a fantastic..
actually a unique..

day after day..
she fallen in love with it..

she went to the gallery..
daily..
to stop in front of it, staring on it
(with big pleasure in her heart)..
she kept its details..
every small detail..
she kept them by heart..

daily..
just to watch it again and again..
and never did she get bored with doing that..

and as the usual,
when u really love something, u wanna to keep it in ur life forever..
and so did she..
she loved it deeply..
so, she wanted to have it for the rest of her life..

she began saving some money every day, in order to have the suitable price for it..

through that, she didn't stop going there..
Never..
she went there..
daily..
stops in front of it, stares on it
(with big pleasure in her heart)
watches its details..
every small detail..
(the details which she kept them by heart)

she waited 4 the right time (when she got the enough money)
but through that,
she kept going there..
daily..
stops in front of it, stares on it
(with big pleasure in her heart)
watches its details..
every small detail..
(the details which she kept them by heart)

and when it came.. the right time (as she thought),

she decided to go there and buy it :)

she went there, but not as her usual
(not as every time)
this time differs than every time..

she didn't stop out in front of it..
and why does she?

there's no need 4 that (she thought), after few minutes it'll be hers :)

she enterd the gallery (4 the first time)..
just thinking it'll be hers, filled her with a lot of beautiful feelings :)
she went to the gallery owner, to buy it..

she: "I wanna to buy that painting.."
the man: "which one?"
she: "that one (with a signal from her hand) "
the man: "I'm afraid u can not.."
she: "why? i brang a good price with me.."
the man: "really? can i see?"
the girl: "here u r (and showed him all the money with her)"
the man: "smiled" (but not a real smile, it was a fake one)
and contrary to what was expected he didn't welcome!

He shocked her by saying:
"no dear,
it's not enough,
it needs more!"

she told him about her loving 4 it..
and how long she kept coming to here just to watch it
she told him that she really loves it,
and she can't imagine her life without coming to here daily as she used to do..

she told him it's the only thing she really needed, and wanted to have 4 the rest of her life..
she tried to persuade him, with telling him that,
she loves it the most,
and so that, she'll care for it the best..
and even if another one came and wanted to get it..

It'll Never be as she does..
she said every thing, every word..
she did her all best..

to make him believe that, she deserves owning it..

but he didn't
didn't agree,
didn't persuade,
didn't beleive..

That she deserves to have it..

But he was kind in some way..
when he told her,
"about that u can't imagine ur life without coming her..
u can keep coming to here daily as u used to do.."

He missunderstood her..

she didn't mean coming to here..

she ment her special moments when she came her and watch it..
the pleasure it could give her by just
stopping in front of it, staring on it
(with big pleasure in her heart)
watches its details..
every small detail..
(the details which she kept them by heart)

but she couldn't say that..

all what she could say:

"Thanks"

she got out from the gallery..
disappointed, depressed, and shocked..
it was a big shock..
a big one that she can't deal with it..
it's a new kind of shocks, she has never ever had before..

she didn't cry..

she didn't complain..

just carried her pain inside herself, and kept smiling
as she always used to do..

she also kept goin' there..
daily..
stopping in front of it, staring on it
(with big pleasure in her heart, but no as the first!)
watches its details..
every small detail..
(the details which she kept them by heart)

trying to persuade herself, that if she really love it, she'll wish the best things for it..
and if another one came..
having more (than she got),
sure will loves it more than she does
and will care 4 it more than she would..
and will deserve it,
when she is not..

sometimes, when the yearning defeated her..
she thinks about talking to the man again..
may be he agree this time..
but then she remembers all what have been happened..
and that she has said every thing can be said..
and it will not be a usefulness to repeat an old words..

another thing prevents her from talking to him..

she's afraid that time he will not only refuse,

No,
who knows,
may be he also prevents her from coming to here again!

and that is a terrible thing she can't even imagine..

so, she preferred not to talk
she preferred silence..

and not talking to him about that again..

and be satisfied with only going there..

daily..
stopping in front of it, staring on it
(with big pleasure in her heart, maybe it's not as the first but it still gives her pleasure to be there)
watches its details..
every small detail..
(the details which she kept them by heart)

it's better than Nothing!

and just hoping that he once compassion for her daily coming there
(just to watch it)

and come to tell her that he believed she deserves
having it..

but she is afraid this day never come..

and she's afraid, one day she stop going there

daily
(as she used to do)

stopping in front of it, staring on i
(with big pleasure in her heart, that she used to have)
watches its details..
every small detail..
(the details which she kept them by heart)

and the big thing which really terrifying her..

when the right one came..
who has more than she does..
who'll care 4 it more than she would..
who'll deserve it, when she is not!
coz then,
she won't even has the right of coming there
daily

stopping in front of it, staring on it
(with the big pleasure in her heart)
watchs its details..
every small detail..
(the details which she kept them by heart..
and she'll always does)
14/02/071:16 PM

Wednesday, February 7, 2007

she called him


she wanted 2 call him

there wasn't any persuasive reasons..

but she needed it!

so she decided to call him..

doesn't care if it's the right decision or not..

she cought her mobile..

wrote his nomber (bcz, she has deleted it before.. but it doesn't mean she forgot it)..

pressed call..

and then, waited for his answer..

every thing run to her mind in those second

what if he didn't answer!

what if he answered!

how she'll talk?

what.......

he answered..


Oh God!


it's the same..

his familiar voice...

his known words..
those words that she always preserved in her mind

(and also in her heart)

he was the same..

and also was she..

her low voice..

her little words..

the smile (that used to have during talking to him) on her face

so, what changed!

the answer was


ALOT


(alot of things has been changed..)


the call ended..

they didn't talk much.. just 4 a minute or maybe minute and half..


Oh God!


it's so long time since they talked on phone..

when was it?

she don't remember definitely..

but she can got it..

she cought her mobile..

go to the caender.. September..

(she can remember it was a tuesday)

yea, here is it..

5/9/2006


how long is it..


she decided to know the nomber of days..

so she'll count them!

say what u want.. crazy, fool..

but she'll do..


she'll count them!


1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10

....................................................................

145,146,147,148,149,...


Oh God!

today is

5/2/2007


it's also the 5th!

what a fate!

it's exactly 5 monthes...


she tryed 2 remember the last call..

and tryed to remember her feelings there..

she thought she'll never talk to him again..

and here she did!


she thought this day'll never come..

and here is it!


she put her mobile away


and one thing was in her mind..

when'll be the next call??!!!

will it be on another 5th!

or maybe there'll not be any another call!

Friday, February 2, 2007

بــــــــــوســــــــــــت بالعــــــــربــــــــــي


أولا البوست المرة دي يختلف عن أي بوست..


لعدة أسباب

أهمها اني كاتبة بالعربي :)

و ده طبعا اعجاز و انجاز و كل حاجة


أولا قبل مابتدي أحب بس أهدي البوست ده لكل حد طلب مني أعمل بوست بالعربي

و خصوصا لهيثم ابو عقرب (عشان متقولش اني حارماك من حاجة بس)

__________



ندخل في صلب البوست بقى :)

انا بما ان ليا جماهيرية عظيمة و محبين كتير و كده

فانا اتمررلي تاجين مرة واحدة


الفقي لما يسعد بقى لول



التاج الأول اتمررلي من تسنيم



خمس حاجات محدش يعرفها

al hidden al side btchaa3y ya3ny lol

اوك يا ستي

خدي عندك

1) انا اسمي منة و دايما لما حد يسألني اسمك ايه اقولله Menna يحسب اسمي مينا اه والله ده انا بعاني :)


2) أخواتي اللي اعتذرتلهم في بوست Due sorry من المدونين :)

الكبيرة هي تسنيم اللي ممررالي التاج ده وانا ابقى خبث اللي مبهدلاني في بوستاتها دايما :(

والتانية بقى بما انها مش مديانا الاذن اننا نقول هيا مين فمش هينفع اقول عليها :)


3) انا بقى عندي قابلية للاستسلام فظيعة!

انا مكنتش كده خالص!

مش عارفة ايه جرالي بس معدش عندي روح المثابرة (حلوة المثابرة دي) بتاعت زمان :(


4) فقدت القدرة على البكاء :)

مع العلم اني نحاحة كبيرة أصلا بس معنتش عارفة أعيط :)


5) عندي احساس اني هموت صغيرة أو عالاقل اول حد في اخواتي و اصحابي

حاسة اني مش هطول هنا :)

كانت امنية في الاول بس دلوقتي بقى احساس :)

__________


الحمد لله خلصنا من واحد ندخل عالتاني بقى..

اللي اتدبست فيه بواسطة


الاستاذ/ عمرو أحمد :)



-اية اللي حيحصل لايميلك لما تموت؟

دايما بفكر في الموضوع ده..

و عندي النية اقول السؤال السري لاخواتي (مش هديهم الباس وورد لأ :)) عشان لما اموت يبقو يفتحوا ايميلي و يقولوا للناس اني مت بدل ميسيبوهم كده :)



-اديت الباس وورد لحد قبل كده؟


آه


-لو اه كانت طبيعة علاقتك بيه اية؟

كان صديق مقرب (جهاد) بس طبعا غيرته من زمان :)



-اسمك؟

منة فهيد

Menna fehead



-اسم الدلع المشهور وسط اصحابك؟


ممكن تقولوا موني


-عمرك؟

النهاردة بقى عندي 17 سنة و 3شهور بالظبط :))



-برجك؟

برج العظماء (معايا يا عمرو :))

العقرب



-مجال دراستك؟

3 ثانوي أزهر

و في قصة قصيرة لازم أقولها بعد الكلمتين دوول

نظام هي اه نظرية واحدة بس ليها 3 نتايج لول

1) اني اخدة سنة 6 فالمفروض انا اكبر بسنة هتقولوا ما 6 رجعت برة دلوقتي

هقولكم بس جيلي الناس اللي أدي مخدتهاش :)

2) اني لما أقول علمي محدش يقوللي علمي علوم ولا رياضة عشان التوكنولوشيا دي لسه موصلتلناش الصراحة

معندناش رفاهية الاختيار دي

احنا العلمي عندنا

شـــــــــــــــــــــامــــــــــــــــــــل


يعني فيزيا و كيميا و احياء و رياضة 2 :)

3) محدش يسأل عملتي ايه في 2؟

عشان الازهر 2 نقل عادي

3 بس اللي شهادة :)


-شخصيتك نوعها ايه؟

شخصية ما يعلم بيها اللا ربنا :)))

بجد مش عارفة اقول ايه..

بس هي شخصية مش سهلة على عكس الظاهر :)

قليلين أوي اللي فهموها وانا مش من ضمنهم :)))

أنا عارفة ان دي مش اجابة محددة..

بس أنا بحب الغموض :))



-السفر بالنسبة لك؟

أكيد حاجة تعقد..

بس يتنفذ بالشكل الصح :)



-المود بتاعك؟

أصلا انا اليومين دوول بقيت مجنونة رسمي و بضحك بشكل غبي على أي و كل حاجة :)

بس عامة انا بهزر كتير أوي

و بهيس كتير أوي

بس عندي جانب الجد برده مانيش أي كلام يعني :)

"زوروني تجدوا ما يسركم ":))




-وقت فراغك بتعمل فيه ايه؟

بعمل الحاجات اللي ببقى عايزة اعملها

قراءة, نت, تليفونات, أفلام..

حسب مزاجي لما بفضى ببقى عايزة اعمل ايه :)


-الاكلة المفضلة؟

مبحبش الاكل عموما :)

نظام الطبيخ و كده مليش فيه.. أي حاجة عيش و تفاليت بقى أحبها

بس بعشق السيبيا و الجمبري :)


-الصفات اللي خدتها من بابا؟

مفكرتش في الموضوع ده قبل كده الصراحة

أنا شبه بابا شكلا أصلا

و ان كانت عنيا مش خضرا زي عنيه :(

مممممممممممم

ممكن يكون الكلام الكتير :)))

و حب الفلوس الفكة:)))))

دي كفاية اصلا لول

و مش عارفة ايه تاني بقى....


-الصفات اللي خدتها من ماما؟

ماما...

أكيد العند بس انا اخداه متحور شوية

بعند على نفسي مش عالناس :)

حكاية ان محدش يلعب في شنطتي :))

اني متحطش في موقف اني اتحوج لحد في فلوس ابدا :)



-اكتر 6 حاجات بتكرهها؟

البروووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووووود

استحمل أي حاجة اللا اني اتعامل مع انسان بارد و قلبه ميت و لكعي كده


الظلم


اني احس بالعجز واني مش قادرة اعمل حاجة!


المحشي والسمك :))))))))))))))))))))))))


الابتزاز العاطفي


عدم التقدير



-اكتر 6 حاجات بتحبها؟


اكيد ربنا:)


الصداقة


الجو الاسري و العائلي


الضحك


أي فيلم اجنبي فيه فساتين منفوشة و خيول والنظام ده :))))))))))

(حيث انتمي)


الفلوس الفكة :))))

تقريبا ده مرض اصلا :)

ممكن أموت لو معييش في محفظتي عالاقل 15 جنيه فكة :))

أكتر حاجة وصلتلها كانت 42 جنيه لول




-الشغل بالنسة لك؟

متعة بدال عن حب و في جو تعاون في المكان اللي بتشتغل فيه



-ايه الكمبيوتر والانترنت بالنسبة لك؟

عالم آخر :)
__________

ادبس الناس بقى زي ما ادبست انا :)

التاج الاولاني بتاع تسنيم

بمرره لكل من:

عمرو أحمد

اسراء

الطربوش (الدسوقي)

طلال فيصل

sofinqoraso


التاني بتاع الاسئلة الكتير ده

بمرره لكل من:

تسنيم

هيثم ابو عقرب

القمحاوي

الحصان الاسود